The accounts setup is taking way way too long. And some ios users have
paid for pro and haven't gotten it. This way, they will at least get it
ASAP. I should have done this weeks ago.
I'm calling this event gj_app_update as firebase automatically sends an
app_update event. This is being done so that I can easily remove
firebase analytics in the future.
It makes the entire code base far more complicated and the round trip to
get the directory really isn't that much. This is a massive
micro-optimization for very little benefit.